Am I ugly? Girls ask strangers online

Written By Unknown on Senin, 18 November 2013 | 18.47

A disturbing new trend online has young girls uploading their pictures and videos and asking strangers if they are ugly. Experts warn against this dangerous measure of self-worth

Sure, people can go to extremes for vanity but this one is as vague as it is dangerous. A new alarming trend has gone viral on a video sharing site where young girls are questioning their looks and looking to be validated by even by people they don't know and obviously, have never met!

Creepy, degrading feedback
Practically a 24x7 obsession with their looks has made Gen Y do something like this. So, girls as young as even nine to 14 are asking other users whether they're pretty or ugly, and approximately 500,000 of these videos have been uploaded on the site, says a report. One video says: "I have an important question for you guys, 'cause I hear a lot, from, like, my friends and boys, that I'm really pretty. Or they say I'm really ugly. And I just want to know the truth." Another says, "A lot of people call me ugly, and I think I am ugly and fat." What is worse is that the comments that follow these videos are disturbing as some users have suggested these girls to hurt themselves, while others have picked features that they could fix. Experts say this is extremely dangerous and can scar a person for life, even prompting him/her to so something drastic.

No one knows the 'real' you
Seeking others' opinions is a consistent habit, says clinical psychologist and counselor Varkha Chulani. "You don't need anyone else's opinion but we still always look for validation all the time, it's the lifeline of most people. There is constant insecurity and that is how it starts," she says. There are several reasons for this. "For one, investment in emotional relationships is at an all-time low; parents have no time to reinforce the child. Most interactions are critical and focusing on the negative rather than seeing what a person can do, that's why nourishment is being sought from strangers. Another factor that prompts this is that people would rather seek acceptance from people who don't know them. A girl who uploads a picture of herself and seeks an opinion feels the other person won't know about what is going on internally. No one knows the real you. Thus, it's a facade and pretence, actually."

The fad is symbolic of a young culture that's obsessed with being superficial, says clinical psychologist, Dr Seema Hingorrany. "It's extremely disheartening to see this; it's a very negative trend. I get so many youngsters who come in and say they are not pretty. Now, getting 50 likes is compared to a friend who has 150 likes. Another girl who has just passed from school actually asked a photographer to click pictures for her online profile. She says she wasn't photogenic enough and her skin wasn't 'ok'. What these girls should be asking is not how they look to the rest of the world, but focus on their own unique qualities and abilities. Beauty is not just about colour and face, but about the personality. Parents must remind their kids that they are special and beautiful. You have to build self-esteem by having awareness of your potential and enhancing this. Start loving yourself, this is crucial," she says.


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