You feel that you have finally met 'the' person and you both share an intense, almost unbelievable chemistry. You sure hope that it will be like that forever, but will it? It is sad but we have to burst your little bubble - it will not. In the beginning, every relationship flows perfectly. All the obstacles seem to be pushed away by the amazing love and romance you both share. However, slowly, and surely reality sets in. The rose coloured glasses fall off and you are left to face the facts of life while love takes wings and threatens to fly off the nearest window!
If you want your incredible, unbelievable romance to sustain and grow into something that lasts and is more concrete then you need to put in a lot of work into it. Of course love is a part of your relationship but there are other areas too that need to be worked on to make that love last for life.
Learn to give in sometimes
You should not expect that you would get you way all the time. You have to learn to think of your partner too. Making little sacrifices can help your relationship grow. So what if you do not want to go out today, so what if you feel like watching a movie that your partner does not, so what if you are feeling too tired - if you have promised to go out, do the dishes, or help her/him in home chores, you must. Putting your partner and his/her wishes first, can really strengthen you bond. It is wise not to keep score of the things you do for each other. Years of hard work you have put into a relationship can be wrecked if you say something like - I have done it the last two weeks now it is your turn. Go out of your way even if you know it is not your turn. And do this not because you expect something back in turn but because you really want to make your partner happy.
Talk a lot and always be ready to listen
A typical situation - He always leaves the wet towel on the bed. You get upset but do not let him know. He is always hogging the remote. You hate it but never tell him so. One fine day when you are shopping he tries to hurry you up and says he does not like shopping. That is the last straw and you explode! Things that have been on your mind for sometime now, take center stage and the words start flying. The poor man wonders what hit him and he genuinely does not understand what led to this absolute fury. You could easily avoid this situation if you communicate well. Tell him/her what bothers you and why as soon as you encounter it. Effective communication can go a long way. If something is bothering you - share it with your partner immediately. Avoid carrying it on quietly.
And even if a situation arises when you both end up having a little argument, never bring up past incidents that had ticked you off and you'd not said anything about them earlier.
Stay focused
Always be ready to listen to him/her. Try and understand their point of view- this doesn't necessarily mean that you will have to agree on everything he/she says. Forgive and forget more, whenever requires - Trust us, it is a very effective way to maintain relationships.
Do not crowd in on your partner
Giving your partner the space he/she needs can sometimes work magic for your relationship. We are living in a crowded world and there is a deluge of information around us and this is the reason that we sometimes need some quiet time to ourselves and when we go out of our way to provide that sanctuary to our partner, it shows that we not only care about them but also really respect them. Of course sharing intimacy and affection on a regular basis is healthy but giving your partner a lot of space is very important too. Being in close proximity to your partner an inordinate amount of time can feel downright claustrophobic. Help him/her get out of this by giving him/her the required space.
Relationships need a lot of work and you should be prepared to go all the way if you really want it to last. Of course your love will carry you through all the obstacles but factors the above mentioned factors are also important. Work on these and see you relationship mature gracefully.
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